His actions were only deepening the feelings she had finally allowed herself to admit and while she still had reservations about it all she ignored them, basking in what she thought would be a new begining. "I love you Lionpride." It was strange to say those words aloud, but with that strangeness there was also ease and truth, he was speaking of things she had only ever dreamt of as if he was pulling them straight from her mind. Love, kits, growing old with someone you cherish, she wanted it all and it seemed at last the world was granting her wish. She lifted her paws and curled them around his neck, pulling him into a hug as nuzzled her face into the thick fur on his neck. "You keep my hope for life alive."

Lionpride closed his eyes as his mate pulled him in close. As the sudden warmth washed over him, his eyes opened to find that Aconite was gone. Now laying below him was a very different she-cat. Startled, his eyes widened but wasn’t able to pull away from her embrace as she held on tightly. He felt his cheeks flush with heat, embarrassed beyond belief. “Pollendrone...” he managed to stutter out gently tugging backwards trying to escape her grip without hurting her “uhh Pollendrone.. what... what are you doing?” 

Lionpride backed away to a more respectful distance, his heart sinking at the hurt expression on her face as he pulled away from her embrace. He hadn’t want to hurt her, but none of this was making any sense. The sweet scent of aconite still lingered on his fur, but she was no where to be seen “Pollendrone I...” his heart ached for her, but he didn’t know What he had done to warrant such a reaction... it was her that had grabbed onto him “I don’t know what I did to hurt you, but I apologize” he really meant it, the words coming from his heart “I don’t understand.. I was just with Aconite, but then...” he looked up into her eyes “well then you were there and she was gone” 

“No I wasn’t with you” he replied firmly, sticking to what he knew to be true. “Me and Aconite met at the top of the ceremony hill... we were talking about” the words caught in his throat, the conversation he had just had was very personal in nature and not exactly something he thought Pollendrone would take kindly to since the two of them were meant to be getting married “no that meant to be just between the two of us, what did you do with Aconite?”
.....................
The warm light vanished, leaving Lionpride feeling cold staring into the darkness of the prison he shared with Pollendrone. His head was pounding as he lifted a paw to rub at his temple. So it was just a dream, at least things were starting to make some sense now. In dreams anything was possible, but the hurt expression on her face still weighed heavily on his heart. Hearing her stir, his ears flickered towards her “Pollendrone... you awake?” He mewed softly “I just had the strangest dream...”

Lionpride leaned his closer until his long was crushing against hers “Well...” he mewed as he tried to figure out how to explain it “I know this is really going to sound strange, but since Aconite passed away I dream of her a lot. It’s helped me to be able to forgive myself for what happened that day... I know it sounds crazy, but being able to tell her about Mousepaw and Earthpaw... It’s like even though she is gone she can still be part of our lives. We were at the ceremony springs, and...”he paused, trying to figure out the best way to word what had happened “We had a personal moment.... She pulled me in close for a kiss and then.... we’ll it wasn’t her anymore, but you”

"What was always you?" he asked blinking in confusion, starting to pick up on the anger hiding underneath the surface, not that he really understood it. Was she mad that he had a dream about her? Or was it that she was made that in the dream he had kissed her? He felt heat flush to his cheeks "Pollendrone.. why are you angry with me? It was just a dream" He moved his paw onto hers  trying to put this all together while being sincere about that fact that he really never meant to hurt her "Just talk to me, what is going on?" he paused trying to reign himself in "No matter what it is, I won't be angry with you. We are in this together now. I don't understand why you are so upset, but I can't do anything to fix that unless you tell me what it is that has upset you"

Things were starting to make sense now, sort of. There was one else there at the ceremony springs, the only way should would have known those things was if she had been there herself... how he wasn’t sure, but someone had been manipulating them. At least he understood why Pollendrone was angry now, she thought the words he had spoken to Aconite were for her... He would have never played with her heartstrings in such a manner, and whomever was behind this was cruel “Pollendrone... I never meant to hurt you. I swear that that the cat I was seeing was Aconite... I don’t know how, but I believe someone was toying with our dreams...” he looked up into her eyes “But I do think we should talk about this.... about Aconite. If we are going to be married you deserve to know the truth about her”

“Aconite and I met when were just apprentices... It was actually my first time out of camp”he chuckled remembering the memory fondly “I had went out to release a mouse by the border so that no one would hunt it. See Whiskers I had named him. I had hand reared it in my mother’s den, keeping him secret from the rest of the clan. But just as I let him go, I saw her... Sleek, beautiful, and skilled ready to pounce on ser whiskers. I leaped on her and well we soon became friends. We started meeting, but she was from NightClan and my mother wasn’t happy about it. However when an earthquake hit nightclan she fled injured and afraid... I brought her back to camp to be healed, and she decided to stay as an initiate to be with me. We were young, but even then I knew that I was completely in love with her... It wasn't long before we found out that we were going to have kits, but then Foxbane returned. She wanted to kill me, my mother, my entire family... Eventually things came to a boil, and she ordered my mother to execute us during a clan meeting. As you already know, the word of the High Priestess is law, and my mother had to choose between us and disobeying a direct order. She choose another path, she prayed to the Sun God and offered her own life in place of ours before she.. She slit her own throat to keep us safe, to keep her unborn grandchildren safe. Luckily is snapped Foxbane out of her insanity long enough to take back her order, and it wasn't long after that that she stepped down as High Priestess. For a while we got to live in peace"

Lionpride's expression darkened, even thinking about the memory that came next was enough to make his heart aches "Aconite finally began her kitting. I was so excited and nervous, but with my mother by her side I knew everything was going to be ok.She asked me to go and get her some water... or herbs.. I honestly don't remember, I was to excited to do anything to help with the kitting instead of standing there helplessly. When I returned... I.... I" his throat tightened, as tears began to slide down his cheek "Aconite... she... she was cut open, my mother standing over her covered in blood holding Earthpaw. I still don't know exactly what followed. I blacked out, waking up in prison beat up and covered in blood. I was later told that I went into a rage, attacking not only my mother but also nearly killing my sister. For the longest time I thought my mother had killed my mate, but worst of all I blamed myself... I still blame myself" he looked up, but it was to late to keep the tears from falling "Aconite... she died of pregnancy complications and the only thing my mother could do was get Mousepaw and Earthpaw out before the suffocated like their litter mates. I just keeping thinking about how alone and scared she must have been, I didn't even get to say goodbye. I should have never left her side, and I don't think that is something I will ever be able to forgive myself for..."

Lionpride leaned into her warmth, letting his nose brush against the fur of her neck "Don't apologize..." he murmered, knowing that everything he had just said was a lot for her to take in "I hurt you, even though I didn't mean to... I did" he placed his paw onto hers "Since then I haven't been able to bring myself to take on another mate, every time the thought has crossed my mind it feels like I am betraying her memory. I have tried to move on, I just can't" it felt like waves of sadness were washing over his mind, the memories of his deceased mate raw and fresh in his mind "There was even a she-cat that I liked, but taking the next step" he swallowed hard shaking his head "I just..." he took in a deep breathe, releasing it.

"Pollendrone, I know that a big piece of my heart with always remain with Aconite. She was my first love, the mother of my children, and she gave up everything for our family. I can't just set my memory of her to the side" he paused lifting Pollendrone's chin to look at him "But that doesn't mean that I don't care about you to... Its to early to call what ever is going on between us love, but I can honestly say that I do care for you" he released her chin and began to gently trace the scratches on her cheeks "When Bloodystar did this to you, I prayed that he would hurt me instead to spare you. I would have taken your place in a heartbeat to spare you from the pain. I don't know that I will ever be able to love you the way I did Aconite, but maybe one day that will come. I don't want to make false promises to you, to hurt you, or fill your heart with false hope. In matters of the heart, I know all to well how painful it is to be toyed with. But perhaps I can help protect you by taking you as my mate. It's what Bloodystar wants, and I can't bare to see him hurt you like that again... I mean what I said that first day, I don't want to stand in your way of happiness... If later on you find a guy that captures you heart, I won't stand in your way of pursuing them. But until then... perhaps we could be a real couple, supporting one another through these dark times"

“I want to make us work too” he allowed his nose to linger against hers, a weight lifted off his shoulders now that Pollendrone knew about Aconite. She was an important piece of his life, and he couldn’t see any relationship going forward if she couldn’t accept that there would always be a part of him that loved and longed for his first love “You have been nothing but supportive since this whole mess started, and it would be a honor for me to stand by your side” a small pure rumbled in his throat as he cuddled closer, his long tail wrapping around her protectively “However there are a few important things that we will need to talk about... the first thingy that comes to mind is the whole reason Bloodystar put us in here...” he trailed off, trying to figure out the right way to word it “He’s expecting us to have kits of our own... Is that something that you want?” He pauses trying to give her a moment to let his words sink “Pollendrone... I am going to leave that choice to you, and you don’t have to decide now. I will support your decision either way, but I want to ensure that we are on the same page before Bloodystar returns”