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A wretched sob strangled him as he staggered against the wall of his den, digging his claws into the long threads of his nest to keep a grip on something as his vision swam and he felt sick from the rising panic in his chest. He'd done so well, it had been nearly a quarter-moon since he'd had a breakdown, but now— but now—
He sank to the ground snarling at the demons in his mind as he fought valiantly to scare them back into hiding. This wasn't the time, wasn't the place, he had told his deputy to come to his den, but he couldn't let her see him like this, he couldn't.
Eventually, with an exhaustive effort, he was calming. His shaking eased as his head dropped to the ground and he slowly relaxed, let his breath sort itself out as the panic and grief and fear left him. He couldn't remember, now, what had started it this time; thoughts of the former leader, maybe, or his mother, or his new responsibilities to the clan. Chim coughed raggedly into the disturbed dust of his den. He was supposed to be professional, composed, not like this anymore, Tuskblood must be nearly here by now, unless she was already here and saw him and turned and left. He swallowed as he slowly pushed himself to his paws and turned to face the den entrance, doing his best to tidy himself up. It didn't work well; no amount of grooming could take away the terror in his gaze or the dark sleepless imprint left under his eyes.
But he'd always looked like a mess. Maybe she wouldn't notice. They had important matters to discuss, probably. He hadn't been a very good friend, or leader for that matter.
winterclan's leader and mistakenly caught floaty thing
2,485 posts
Post by simplylight on Aug 7, 2019 11:20:03 GMT -5
Life had been strange since she joined Waterclan.
Tuskblood made her way towards Chim's den, feeling the prickling eyes of others follow her most of the way there. Catching Egretfeather's eye, she gave a humorous smirk and wink in the she-cat's direction. This apparently threw her off and she was met with a gasp in return. The black deputy chuckled and shook her head. She was used to this kind of response. Her whole life she had been feared and questioned, but she learned to embrace it. Sometimes she used it to her advantage. However, as she neared his den and heard a heart-dropping sob, she knew this was not one of those times. Her ears flew back on her head. What was she supposed to do? She didn't imagine he meant for her to strut in on his pity fest. In fact, she was surprised he called her at all. The past moon or so, he had been oddly...distracted. She couldn't place a paw on it, but something was off. He hadn't spoke to her in forever. Her mind flashed to the Black Moon Gathering and she could feel the irritation stinging at her throat. Nah, he had found himself another Summerclan cat to befriend. Guess once they're Waterclan, he doesn't give a rat's behind. She thought her bitter thoughts for a moment then shook her head at herself. Quit being so emotional, you angry kit. There's no use in being jealous.
Twitching her ears as she heard another sob, she decided to simply sit outside his den until he calmed down. She'd rile him up later, but it wasn't any fun when he was upset.
By the time he finished neatening up he looked almost back to his normal self -- messy, skinny, and sour. And where was Tuskblood? She still hadn't shown herself, and she was late. He stalked out of the den and cast a suspicious side glance around, only to spot her sitting outside his den. Chimerastar's lip curled. So she'd been there, listening to him humiliate himself this entire time, and didn't even have the decency to leave? He knew he shouldn't be angry, but it was the easier way to cope with knowing she had heard him.
"Really, Tuskblood? You're late? I would have thought being a deputy was more important to you than that," he sneered. "Are you going to be this late to all our meetings?"
Flicking his tail, he turned and stalked back into his den.
Edited Aug 9, 2019 10:16:23 GMT -5 By Cleaver | Reason: corey kept hitting send rip