Warrior Cat Clans 2 (WCC2 aka Classic) is a roleplay site inspired by the Warrior series by Erin Hunter. Whether you are a fan of the books or new to the Warrior cats world, WCC2 offers a diverse environment with over a decade’s worth of lore for you - and your characters - to explore. Join us today and become a part of our ongoing story!
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Shadedsun hadn't had a moment of rest since Lilydawn had handed over her kits, gave them names, avoided his questions It happened too fast, he hadn't been able to get a word in, demand an explanation, do anything other than stare at the spot her blurred shape had been and let his thoughts run. In that moment the world had been lost to him. Their mewling drowned out by the strange ringing of his ears that began when he realized he likely lost another kit. First his sons, his daughter, and now Lilydawn. Starclan had it out for him, he was sure. His head didn't have time to clear, per say, but he had gathered enough wits to realize there were four bundles at his paws, crying and confused, and he immediately pushed everything else away, crouching down to shush them and let them warm up in his mane of fur. Slowly but surely, he got them to camp, spending the next few days entirely sleepless, hovering as they got check-ups to make sure they weren't hurt or ill or starving, trying to set up a messy nest in the nursery, figuring out how he was going to feed them. He didn't have time to process. Where Shadedsun would have grieved completely and sometimes destructively, now he pushed it away for another date. Living. As much as he said he preferred it compared to the dark void he had been granted in his death (Starclan once again pushing him away), he wasn't sure if he actually missed it all, especially at times like this.
But it was all fine. Alright, even. It was perfect, wonderful. He could breathe. But where he could breathe he could think, and where he could think he could worry. His fears bit at him, his anxieties curled his gut. He had avoided being a father after he came back to life out of fear — he failed once, twice, now four times, and he was sure it would happen again. He couldn't take care of them, he couldn't give them what they deserved. Letting the air out of his cheeks, he wished for nothing more than the company of Doefreckle. It was a quiet morning in Summerclan camp. Last time he checked (two seconds ago, because he kept poking his head into the nursery and listening for their voices or their movement), the kits were still asleep. The fresh air was nice. He'd almost felt stir-crazy, but he didn't dare leave beyond his new sitting spot just beside the den entrance. They'd startled toddling a little while ago, and he was too worried to feel very proud, and now they were surely ready to cause trouble — albeit clumsily, their legs still new and fragile. He hoped none of them were like Lilydawn when she was a kit, too curious for her own good and reckless enough to nearly cause him and Doe multiple heart attacks. He set up the kitten arena in Springclan mostly thinking of her, though it had been for all his previous children. They hardly got to use it. Thoughts of them had been nagging him. A rustle near the nursery entrance caught his attention.
fox @dot @starkravingmad wrenpansy <3 FAMILY BONDING! Hopefully! Don't mind the length it's mostly exposition JKDVNJKD
When her dad — granddad? — looked towards her, Peonykit made herself smaller, freezing from where she'd been trying to creep out of the nursery unnoticed, and gave a sheepish little grin. "Sorry," she told him quietly. Letting out a high, nervous little titter — she was still learning that the sounds she made for herself could be heard by others — she crept along the outside wall and, glancing again at Shadedsun, suddenly darted out her paw and grabbed a pink flower growing against it. She put the stem in her mouth. Eyes still locked with his, like she was trying to work out just how much he could see, and whether or not she could disappear if she stayed still enough, or moved quickly enough, she shuffled a little further along the wall — and snapped up another flower, this time a yellow one. And on she went, until she had a little bouquet.
Then, walking over to Shadedsun with the tattered stems trailing in the sand, she held them up to him with them still in her jaws. "I was trying to make it a surprise," she told him, voice completely muffled around the flowers; drool frothed out of her mouth and she made a disgusting slurping sound to try and suck it back in past the flower stems. It was completely ineffectual. A drop of it landed on the sand at her paws. "But you saw me." Her eyes were bright; her smile was beaming and hopeful, like she wanted to hear that he was happy with the present, that it made him feel loved. She didn't notice the drool at all — all she saw was Shadedsun. "D'you like it?" Setting the flowers down atop her paws, she looked back up and her beam grew wider, close-mouthed and thin and dimpling both her cheeks so much they pressed up against her eyes. All of her was hope. Hope as yet unbroken, untainted; there was nothing sad there, only love.
As all this went on, another quiet gaze watched from the nursery entrance. The kitten had watched, but not followed, as his sister had left. Unlike Peonykit, the thought of leaving the nursery without permission scared Marigoldkit. Too young to know what was acceptable or not, frozen by fear of rules he did and did not know, and not willing to risk that what Peonykit was doing was wrong and that he wouldn't get in trouble for doing the same thing, he merely watched.
Even still, a pang of jealousy touched him, one that he was too young to really analyze, at the fact that he was not the one to think of doing something nice first. That he instead had been frozen, and wholly uncreative. Even if he had left, would he have thought of something like that? A slight feeling of resentfulness, not aimed at anyone bar perhaps himself, rose up. No, he realized, he probably would not have.
It was not helped by the fact that while Peonykit had proven herself quick to bond, quick to love, quick to get attached, there was an odd distance that the young kit still felt. There was love there, of course -- if not he wouldn't have been watching with such a bubbling concoction of longing, jealousy, and anxiety that he was so desperately trying to swallow down and not show. But yet, there was the secondary odd sense that in some ways, although all his memories he could ever recall centered around Shadedsun with his presence the closest to paternal he had ever known, he did not really know him. He loved him, of course he loved him, but that affection was desperate, based on survival and perhaps, at its core, selfishness. But every once in a while he considered how little he knew about Shadedsun, about everyone, really, and that filled him with an odd lonliness, and an even odder fear of everyone, to some extent, because he did not really know who or what they were at their core.
So Marigoldkit was left peeking his head through the nursery entrance and watching, sad and pathetically, like a dog left in the garden forced to watch his family from a window. Left with only his burning emotions and his thoughts, already too introspective for his own good as he stayed as merely an observer at a distance.
Though he had spent the last while mainly in their presence, he still struggled to discern them at times. For those he was closest too, Doefreckle, his sisters, his daughter, he could tell it was them before they spoke, by the way they held themselves, the sounds of their pawsteps, their very presence, but when it came to others, when it came to these kits, he struggled. He should have gotten it by now. Sorry. Whenever her eyes would have moved, shifted, even if only slightly, Shadedsun's didn't follow, completely unaware they were making eye contact at all but not willing to look away. Her paleness stood out against the shadows — something he was thankful of, as if it had been Petuniakit, he probably wouldn't have noticed her as quickly.
He relaxed his shoulders from where they had stiffened, letting out a breath, something akin to a laugh, "it's alright. Bit early, isn't it? Are your siblings awake?" Perhaps he would have noticed her gift sooner had they been anywhere but Summerclan camp, where all the floral scents mixed together, near confusing, making it difficult to pick them apart. "Surprise?" He questioned, voice low and gentle, but there was a certain cold note to it. Closed off. Reserved. He hated how it sounded and hated even more that he couldn't chase it away, the fear that he would fail them like he had failed before, the fear of having to be a parent once more. He found their innocence both adorable and daunting, so easy to fracture, to ruin, and he regarded their curiosity to the new world in a similar light. He was worried they would get out somehow, or he would leave, return, and they would be injured or dead. Where they used to be a distraction, now they only served as a reminder of the daughter he had lost. He loved them, of course he did, and now that they were in his life he couldn't imagine a world where he didn't, but he couldn't completely open himself up to them, not yet. A part of his fear was selfish, he knew, because maybe he shouldn't have let it get in the way. Laying there, he didn't notice the kit watching from the nursery entrance whose feelings were much too similar to his own.
But you saw me. He laughed again, "still a surprise," he lifted a paw, waved it over his face for effect, his eyes unbothered, "blind as a bat. Mostly." He lowered himself to the ground, a more comfortable height for them both. "What've you got, then?"
Bit early, isn't it? Are your siblings awake? Peony dragged the back of her paw across her mouth, making another faint slurping sound as she cleared her muzzle of spit. "I think they're still sleeping," she replied, her back turned to her brother; she wasn't aware of him, wasn't aware of anything but the faint birdsong in the trees and Shadedsun in front of her. The sun haloed behind his head; she stared, mesmerised, a wide smile slowly spreading across her face. She thought he was the most wonderful cat in the world. When he spoke again, she lowered her gaze from where it had been entranced on his ears to look him in the eye, the wide, dreaming smile still on her face. It stayed as he continued, happiness filling her chest at his support. She didn't hear any coldness, any reserve or uncertainty — she only heard love. When he waved his paw in front of his face, she laughed. "Bats aren't blind!" she replied, lightly scolding him. "Sunveins was in here the other day, you know, when she was checking on us, and she said bats have better eyes than anyone! Anyone in the world! She said that if I were a bat, I could go onto the cliffs and I could stand there and I could see everything across the ocean, everything in the world." She smiled to herself and turned her head, eyes wandering away to the rest of the camp. "I would like to see the ocean," she added to herself, voice a soft murmur. There was no pain there yet. No pain at settling. For now, she still thought all her dreams would happen.
What've you got, then? His voice brought her back to earth and Peonykit smiled even wider, like he could see. She picked the flowers back up and placed them purposefully on the toe bones of his forepaws; they might as well have been larger than her whole body. "Flowers!" she told him, like they weren't the most common thing possible in SummerClan. Like they were something of wonder. Then, she picked up a familiar scent and looked over her shoulder, half-turning. "Marigold!" she greeted, equal parts excited at his presence and scolding the fact he hadn't let them know he was there sooner. Every part the mother of her siblings, a role far too large for one so young. But for now, it still felt like joy, like love. "You're awake! Come on, Mari, come on, come on." She trotted over and ushered him out of the den, over to Shadedsun. "Come on, come on. I just gave Shadedsun our gift — the one we talked about!" They hadn't talked about it, and it was every bit her gift, but she wanted their dad to think Mari had contributed, because it would make both of them happy, Shadedsun and her brother. She didn't need all the credit. She sniffed at him, like she was checking he'd slept well, and sat down in her previous spot. "Did you have any dreams?" She beamed at him, calm and sweet, eyes not leaving his.
i feel really dumb it took me this long to realize shadedsun is blind woops
From the distance, Marigoldkit had continued to watch. The emotions slowly fell away a bit, and a some point it became a bit like watching a play, or a scene. It was easy, in Summerclan's picturesque landscape, to watch everything cast in a soft golden glow of sunlight, with a blue sky backdrop and flowers blossoming on nearly ever bit of greenery, and feel like you were watching a show rather than real life. Like some hazy image befitting a watercolor painting in a victorian children's book; a tiny young girl handing their parent a flower as the birds and squirrels watched from the tree branches above, and the soft spring wind brought in the white clouds in the sprawling cerulean skyline. Of course, Marigoldkit didn't understand any of that. Sitting small and round by the nursery den entrance, curled up all into himself like a tiny cream cottonball, all he knew was the feeling that it was slightly surreal, and that his mind had started to wander. It was funny, the passions and whims of children, how one moment they could be touching on something so profound, and the next be in their own little world.
But he was quickly snapped out of it by the warm voice of his sister, his head jerking up as he realizied that she had noticed that he was there. He had barely even gotten his footing before Peonykit was by him, ushering him over till he too was sitting at Shadedsun's feet. He didn't have time to protest, not that he really wanted to. He was a little too happy to let his sister very obviously show that him leaving the nusery was at her own demand, to make it clear that if something was wrong with this -- which at this point, he figured it was unlikely to be -- that it wouldn't be his fault. But even in that he felt bad, because he didn't want Peonykit to get in trouble either. And then Peonykit spoke up again. I just gave Shadedsun our gift — the one we talked about! His heart plumeted. Was he really that obvious? He felt his ears fall a tiny bit, giving a quick glance at Peonykit and then back at Shadedsun, as if somehow he could see the guilt on his face. And he really did look guilty, with that deer-in-the headlights look on his chubby, rounded little face, and those big, always watery eyes that made it look like at any moment he might start crying. His voice felt small and dry, but the thought of calling his sister a liar, of not accepting the more than kind gesture, felt worse than telling the truth. Which felt horrible in it's own way too, because he didn't want to be a liar, but a lie right now felt like the kindest option. "I hope you liked it." Was his soft, slightly shaky response that barely rose above a whisper, and it sounded so pitifully laiden with guilt.
Luckily, Peonykit quickly drew back his attention, and his round face and amber saucer-shaped eyes turned back to his sister. There was a pause, as if he had to consider it a moment. "No. I don't think I've ever dreamed." He admittedly, a little awkwardly, because while he thought it was true, he wasn't sure. He thought back to last night, and it was all but a black void, and the same when he tried to think back to all the nights before that. He'd heard cats talk about dreams, but for the life of him he couldn't remember having them. He wanted them, was so curious about what other cats saw in their sleep, these strange things where cats saw images as they were otherwise not even aware of the world. And so, less out out of a means of carrying on a conversation and more out of curiosity, he rose a question back. "Did you have any dreams?" Although the question was asked while his gaze still rested on Peonykit, the question was so open that its was clear the kit was slightly inviting Shadedsun to answer too. Could he even dream? Marigoldkit had heard of dreams before as images in cats minds at night. But what if you couldn't see? Marigoldkit had never thought about that before, until now.
Shadedsun gave her a deeply regretful look, eyes closing ruefully. "I am so sorry for my mistake, princess. I didn't know bats weren't blind. But I am." He laughed lightly as she described her bat adventures. I would like to see the ocean. He let her words simmer in his mind, how hopeful and young they sounded, completely unaware that Summerclan lived right next to one and she was closer to seeing it than she could ever imagine. He felt a certain pang. At her innocence. He knew he worried too much, that he was too fearful for her future than what she did in the presence, because all he could think about was the cat her mother had become. How he blinked and she had gone from a reckless, loud-mouthed kit to a grown, bitter, secretly soft presence that he was. . . scared of. Just as he was scared of them. Intimated. As if the word was any better.
As Marigoldkit approached, his expression somehow managed to soften even more than it already was. The tom-kit was nothing like his sister. Where Peonykit held nothing but a young joyfulness to her, oblivious to everything that wasn't the beauty before her own eyes, Marigoldkit seemed to withdrawn, too downtrodden, too reluctant, focusing on his anxiety. He was distant, and Shadedsun couldn't blame him. He wished more than ever that Summerclan had some sort of therapist.
"I did have the most strange dream last night. I was going about my day, in my dream, and then suddenly I was approached by. . . someone," the details were fuzzy, "and they said they had no choice but to turn me into a fish. I was a fish! But a land fish. And then I woke up."
I would like to see the ocean. He thought the words over just once more, finally standing up from where he had been laying next to Peonykit, making sure to place his paws carefully. "You two sit tight, share your dreams, I've got to wake your siblings." He gave a smile. "I've decided to take us on a trip. A surprise." He slipped into the nursery, stepping around nests and stirring kits until he approached his remaining grandchildren (grandchildren? He felt too old), leaning down, paw reaching out as if he were about to shake them awake but deciding not too.
"Up and at it," he greeted quietly, "we're going out, but you don't have to come." The very thought of leaving them in camp without his supervision sent a wave of anxiety, but it wasn't like they weren't safe. There were other queens, warriors, apprentices, even, and there was always someone at least partially responsible close by. And certainly going outside of camp wasn't much better either, despite having them under his watch (however sightless he was), but he'd always regarded Summerclan as purely safe, warm fields and shifting sands offering nothing but to worry about but a crab or a few angry bees. "We're just outside the nursery." He added quickly, turning and slowly padding away, poking his head out the exit where his remaining grandkits still sat.
it all happened because his boyfriend rejected him and so shaded went ‘i can’t fall in love again if i can’t SEE’ and went blind. but joke’s on him because now they’re baby daddies again. also marigold is too precious for words and i'm heaving with sobs
"A land fish!" Peonykit exclaimed in disbelief, like the concept was the strangest thing in the world and Shadedsun was ridiculous to suggest it. "You can't be a land fish! They live in the sea! Because they—" Now she turned to her brother, tapping him frantically on the foreleg to make him pay attention to her impromptu lesson, eager to show off and impart on him everything she'd picked up. "Because they have— they have..." She frowned and looked up at Shadedsun for help, looking more and more upset at her lapse of memory, before remembering for herself; a big, beaming smile covered her face again and she turned back to her brother, doing a small hop of excitement where she sat. "They have gills! They have gills, which are these things in your neck," she gestured to either side of her own, "which make you able to breathe underwater. And it's just the best," she threw her head back to the sky, squeezing her eyes shut and throwing out her forepaws and raising her voice, "thing in the whole world!"
When Shadedsun stood up and padded past her, she gasped and snapped her eyes open, spinning around in the air and landing with her paws all set far apart, like she were bracing herself for an attack — really, she was just very surprised by his declaration. "A trip!" she exclaimed, again echoing him. "A TRIP! Is that allowed? Will Sunstar pick us up and beat us against the camp wall like evil little fur rugs?" Possibly the leader had said something in that vein some time in the past. Overcome by disbelief and excitement, Peonykit let out loud, 'hoo-hoo-hoo' breaths like she was pumping herself up, still standing in that Olympic athlete pose and frowning down at the ground. "GOING OUT!" she suddenly screamed to no one, unfreezing and running a frantic circle around her brother; her paws moved to fast against the shifting sand that she was running almost horizontal. "GOING OUT!" She suddenly slammed into Shadedsun's foreleg from where he was exiting the nursery and fell back against the ground with a sound like a coconut hitting a tree.
He nodded along with her disbelief, agreeing with the ridiculousness of his own dream that, at this point, was nothing but a brief, fuzzy memory anyway. Personally, he could think of a million things better than breathing underwater with the help of thin flesh flaps on his neck, but he didn't say anything out loud. As she slammed into his leg, bouncing back, he winced. "Careful!" He said, voice higher with a tinge of panic as he helped her upright.
He stepped out of the nursery further, shook a few bits of debris from his thick fur where it always collected whenever he entered or left, waiting to see if she was done before he continued. "Yup," he held out a paw as if it would slow Peonykit, "a trip. That is totally, extremely, exponentially allowed." Will Sunstar pick us up and beat us against the camp wall like evil little fur rugs? "What? No!" His face twisted into a look of slight confusion, slight horror at the very thought. He pricked his ears backwards, towards the nursery, to try and pick out any movement from Alliumkit or Petuniakit, but there was nothing. Shadedsun couldn't tell if he was relieved or slightly dejected.
"Okay, okay — we can't go unless you stop yelling so loud, you'll scare all the birds and then they'll be very mad. And trust me, you do not want angry birds after you. But you both," he really only emphasized it so Marigoldkit didn't feel left out or forgotten, "need to follow very closely, where I can feel you. Like next to me. Or hold my tail. Or something. And I can't give piggyback rides downhill because I'll probably fall, so don't try to climb on me or anything." Lilykit and Applekit had seemed especially good at that. He frowned slightly.
He raised his head high, set his face in a faux-tough look, mimicking a sergeant. "Do you, brave ones, pledge to follow my every word and instruction, which is to keep you safest and return you to camp alive. Not that it's. . . scary, or anything," his voice dropped, "but you could get stuck in a bush or get lost or something, and I'd never be able to find you, and then you'd have to walk home all on your own. And I don't think anybody wants that."
amen. i have maybe accidentally stalked old threads for context, they are both beautiful gay disasters <3 also ty ty i'm trying to get a feel for him but so far the energy is shy baby
Marigoldkit had given a small, soft laugh at Shadedsun's retelling of his dream, but it was soon swallowed up but Peonykit's excited, impropmtu lesson. He gave small, gentle half nods that followed along, the tap on his paw only making the dip of his head a little more pronounced and eager, his quite little way of saying, "I'm listening, I swear!" as she continued on her lesson. He had heard of gills to, he remembered hearing of them in passing, but he certainly wasn't about to take away his sister's joy at sharing her knowledge.
And then, the Shadedsun had said they were going on a trip. His eyes had widdened again at the mention of it; it was hard to tell if it was out of surprise, excitement, or fear at the mere implication of going somewhere he didn't know, but they certainly flickered with a strong amount of some emotion. He was midway through opening his mouth to say something, when Peonykit had equally caught onto the fact that they were going on the trip; following the information with a much more overt expression of excitement. So Marigoldkit just sat there, letting his sister run a circle around him and have an absolute hay-day over the realization they were going to take a trip, all the while Marigoldkit was lost in his thoughts curiosities that were mostly drowned out by the sounds of his sister yelling, a gentle, shaky appeasing smile on his face; as if to show that he too at least somewhat shared in her eagerness.
As Shadedsun returned alone, padding back to him with only Peonykit slightly nearby, he too took a moment to slightly lean forward to see if he could pick out his siblings' shapes from the distance. But, much like Shadedsun, he saw nothing, and so merely turned his attention back to him and his sister, quietly hearing out the advice. Admittedly, the mention of the birds alone made him nervous, his ears dropped slightly as he recalled a passing story about birds attacking an apprentice that had gotten too close to their nest. It was a scary thought, that the very prey they ate could attack them, and it wasn't helped by the very serious nature Shadedsun was treating all this with. Shadedsun could say it wasn't scary all he wanted, but it was like when adults told children that shots wouldn't hurt and that grape medicine wouldn't taste bad; you knew they were probably lying by the fact they bothered to try so hard to convince you otherwise. Not like the implication that they could get stuck or never found again helped Shadedsun's case, the idea of never being found again to a child that already had abandonment issues sounded like a fate worse than death.
Even still, the anxiousness and fear that burned away at him meant the kitten was more than eager to treat it with the seriousness he felt it deserved, giving a small nod and a quiet, "Yes sir. I will." as he padded over and softly pressed his side into his front leg. It was in part, obviously, to follow the order that was given, but equally out of some slight need for reassurance.
"Okay." He almost sounded nervous. Though he knew he couldn't see him, Shadedsun looked down to where Marigoldkit leaned against his leg. "Okay," this time, his words were more chipper, and he softly, with a hovering paw, ushered Marigoldkit away from his leg so he could walk without tripping over him. He paused again, hesitating, mouth open as if to say something, but no words came until he forced another, "okay."
Before he could think of a way to stall any longer, despite being the one who suggested the idea, a thin, stony form appeared at the exit of the nursery, peering out with a face set in confusion, brows pushed together like she was trying to figure out what was going on but what too drowsy to think clearly. Obviously, Petuniakit had just woken up. "What's going on?" Her voice gave her identity away where her appearance wouldn't have, the dry tone, the slight conjecture, as if they were doing something they shouldn't have been doing, the underlying quietness. Shadedsun greeted her with a warm smile and a raise of his fluffy tail.
"Wonderful timing, Petuniakit — we're going outside for a little adventure, want to join? You've got to stay by my side though, I don't need anyone getting lost." At Shadedsun's proposition, the she-kit looked doubtful, eyes squinting further before, eventually, she stepped out of the nursery to join them.
She stopped at Peonykit's side, brushing against her. "I thought we weren't allowed outside or nothing. But okay. I'll make sure Peonykit doesn't wander off." She sent a slight smile towards her sister, lightly teasing.
Shadedsun, after gathering them close with a few waves of his paw, doing a quick headcount even though there were only three of them and they were right beside him, started a slow pace towards the camp exit. "It's fine if I'm with you, I'm sure." He didn't sound entirely convinced, but he continued anyway, "we're going to the beach. The one with all the sand and stuff, next to the. . ." he paused for dramatic effect, "ocean! It's around the season you might see twoleg boats." He led them through the exit tunnel, wincing as the gorse pulled at his fur, "careful, it's prickly."