One would've thought that after all these years, after everything she had been through, she'd avoid anything to do with the league. Truly, she had tried. She had left the moment she had watched in horror as the life left her mother's eyes, the blood staining her golden paws, and she had fled from everything she had ever known. There was nothing left in Primal Instinct for her. As she ran, there were so many things running through her head. Would her kits ever forgive her? Would they even survive after she had gone? She could remember Avi's face, poor, sweet Avi, who had died because of her, because she didn't know better...

She hadn't thought about it in years. The thought of her kits made her feel almost guilty; they must've felt as if both their parents abandoned them, when all she wanted to do was hold them, tell them how much their father loved them, how much she cared for them, why she couldn't stay...but then again, she had kitted once more since, and she had abandoned them too, accidentally bumping into her brother and giving them to him. She wondered how they were doing, sweet Aleksy, lovely Evenie...

Most nights, she'd never think of this, focusing simply on the fact that she needed to move on. This forest was different from the one she grew up in but it felt almost the same, the way the sky was covered by the trees and the darkness felt almost oppresive. She was a wanderer, slinking through the night with little goal or purpose these days, having killed off parts of her family and watched the rest rot from the inside.

Suddenly, the scent of something hit her as the winds stilled, switching around so that she was upwind again. No. A shudder ran down her spine as her hazel eyes widened in something that hadn't occurred in her gaze since her mother had died in her claws. Fear. She felt her throat close, the thick feeling of her childhood memories now leaking in like a hole in the boat, a trickle inwards and a crushing grip outwards as it tore through her mind.

"I thought you were dead," her voice fought to hold still, her eyes narrowing. It sounded different than the cute, stuttering mewl she had when she was a kit, her raspy voice seemed as if it was rarely used these days. The black and white pelt was a familiar sight, one she hoped to never see again. Immediately, she felt the murderous rage swell up in her, the same way it did the night she had found Avi's dead body. She was going to kill this cat if that was the last thing she'd do.

Her claws were already unsheathed as she faced him down, a snarl on her face this time instead of the brimming innocence and fear, but it was clear from the way her tail shook that little had changed since.

She knew exactly what kind of reaction he wanted to get from her. She wasn’t the naive, idiotic kit she used to be, who believed everyone would warm up to her eventually, who believed that everyone deep inside them had some goodness within...no, Bellamy had been the first cat who had proved that to her, even before her mother. Even before Daireanne had slayed her lover and tore their family apart. Nyx had showed her that not all cats were evil, but Bellamy had showed her that evil existed everywhere.

She still had a scar across her shoulder to prove it.

“Play?” her voice was low, barely above a whisper, and for a moment, her facade cracked, the flash of hurt crossing her face with an almost pitiable desperation, of a wound that still had yet to heal, open and festering. “You want to see how I play?” her tone had shifted immediately, to ice that seemed to freeze hell over with a slow kind of rage.

Immediately she found herself next to him, claws lunging forward, a slash across his face, her fangs already bared to catch the other cat’s jungular in her jaws, hatred spewing from her like a volcano. He had tormented her all of her kithood, forcing her to do his bidding lest he did something terrible. There was no time to relive the trauma again, she was ready this time. She wasn’t the kit she used to be, she told herself. She’d finally get her revenge.

She had told herself the same way her mother did when she was little, emotions ruined everything. Fire can get out of control and cause damage all over but it was a force that could be quelled. Water, however...the waves could never be tamed, they were the master of your fate. They did as they pleased, they gave and they took away. They did not bow to kings nor queens. Her father had told her that she as future queen must be both fire and ice, that rationality must always win above emotion.

She had never truly listened to her parents’ words. Safiya had been young and naive then, and even now, the lack of training was evident in her moves. She knew how they worked, but there wasn’t a heart in her fight. She had always been a lover not a soldier. Driven by her rage, she didn’t realise he was gone until she came crashing to the ground as her balance slipped, rolling forward as she managed to land on her paws again, dust lining her long fur. She gritted her teeth.

“I’m not the kit you used to bully,” she spat, fury in her gaze, “I’ve taken down worse than you.” Her words were filled with a certain bite, but the way her hazel eyes had widened briefly expressed that she was still trying to believe that too.

She didn’t stay down for long; if Safiya was anything, she was determined. Immediately, she launched herself at him again, now aiming for his haunches, her eyes narrowed as she tried to rein in the wildfire of her emotions.

"–and you're a fool if you think I'm the same idiot you picked on when we were younger," she snarled back, her voice shrill, holding malice as if it was a palpable thing. Despite the years of hardship, of traveling around living on her own rather than being a pampered little princess under Severine's grip, she still held the childish charm, the wide-eyed gaze of her kitten days and the high-pitched tone of her meow was a reminder of who she had been, the naive little kit who had been too young when her innocence was stolen away.

Safiya didn't hesitate, once more she was on her paws, claws aimed directly for his face without another word, just gritted teeth and a fire in her gaze that seemed determined to take Bellamy down at any cost.