How long had it been since someone had asked to speak with her about anything other than the herbs that got shoved down her throat every morning and every night to keep her in a drugged induced calm. It was the only thing that kept her somewhat sane, at the very least left without the energy needed to act on her murderous impulses. She had been trying hard to break out of the depression that weighed heavily on her shoulders, at the insistence of Snakebounce and Valleyrose. They had taken out the old burned nest that she had once shared with him, and with it the last physical piece of Oaskshade that she had left to cling to. She had cried, and cried, even as her two kits made her a new and far more comfortable nest that wouldn't leave her with sores. She had wasted away, even as they did her best to get her to eat and groomed her fur each night. 

As her head rose out of the nest, it was almost like a serpent. Her golden eyes flickering dangerously "What about her?" her voice tense and crackling 

For a few moments Tinymutiny was still save for the flickering of her eyes, leaving the tom waited on baited breath for her reaction. In a flash, she was on top of him holding him to the ground with claws digging into shoulders and teeth bared in an open snarl. For even though she was small, she had been trained since birth to make full use of every ounce of strength that she had. She weighed nearly nothing compared to Caranagepanic, and yet her precise attack left him unable to fight back without seriously harming his shoulders and wrenching them out of place. 

He was probably expecting her to scream or lecture him, but the quiet calm voice that was to follow was far more frightening "You will do no such thing" 

For a heartbeat it looked like Tinymutiny was going to go through with her threat, her muzzle lowering towards his exposed neck. It was only his last ditched cry that caused her to pause, her teeth grazing the soft flesh of his neck before lifting her head "Then don't do it, all mates do is cause you pain. Taking part of your soul when they leave you that you'll never be able to replace. Even the best mates in their god-forsaken cruel earth will eventually rip your heart into shreds. Valleyrose deserves better than that" Almost as quickly as it had appeared, the fury on her face dissipated.She pushed herself off of Carnagepanic, returning to her nest with a vacant expression, that despite the bleeding wounds she had left behind it was if nothing had happened.

"Perfect had nothing to do with it" she growled, twitching almost as if she was ready to pounce once more "You can be the most perfect cat in the world and still be wrong for someone, or the most imperfect cat whose perfect for someone" to some it might have sounded like that ramblings of a made cat, and perhaps it was. But the meaning was still there "Mates are like two broken pieces of a stone, jagged and sharp without one another but when they come together they become whole. One cat's abilities making up for the other's blemishes" 

"When the time comes you just know" it wasn't much of an answer, but it was the truth.  Her eyes clouding over as she laid he head on her paws, the memories of her deceased mate taking over. She wasn't even speaking to Carnagepanic at this point, to lost within her own mind


"I didn't know right away, or perhaps I did and just refused to accept it. Either way, Oakshade spent moons chasing after me trying to convince me of the connection I denied. He never gave up, no matter what I did or how hard I pushed him away. I wanted him to stay away, afraid that his pursuit of me would end in his death. I warned him... I did. I begged for him to move on and find someone else, yet he always returned to me in the end. No matter how angry I got with him, I still worried about his happiness and safety. I was willing to give up everything to keep him safe, even any hope of a relationship. They day he got dragged back to camp by Foxbane I was furious, knowing what it meant and being unable to tell him the truth. I didn't get it... Why he would do all of this for a girl he hardly knew?  A girl who had by all accounts had been terribly mean and hateful to him. It wasn't until much later during the romance festival that I understood. True love has no limits or conditions. There was nothing I could have done to dissuade him. He was is love, and so was I. Love isn't something that you give only on a cat's best days, it's how you treat them at their worst. Its taking your partner's worst qualities and still admiring them. It is believing in them, when they don't believe in themselves" as she finished her voice cracked, unable to hold back her sobs any longer

"Oakshade loved every part of me. Good, bad, and ugly. His love never faltered...  Each day that passes its harder to picture his face, to remember his scent. Each day that I live on, more and more of him slips away. I cling to the tatters of what's left, afraid to let go lest he disappear all together. He was strong enough to love me without fail, but with every memory that becomes fuzzy it's like I'm betraying his love for me. My kits say to move on, but they don't understand. What if one day I forget completely?" 

Tinymutiny hadn't really been paying attention to Carnagepanic, he could have walked on out the den and she probably wouldn't have even noticed. It was only when he spoke the she lifted her weary head, blinking until the tears cleared and she could see that it wasn't Oakshade standing before her "You sound a lot like him you know..." she mewed quietly, almost as if she hadn't heard what he had said, but those words... Well they meant far more to her than he would ever realize. It was like a weight had been lifted off her shoulder, a burden of trying to cling to every small detail slowly dissipating. That in doing so, she was betraying his memory....

"You know, I was wrong about you" she began, waiting to let those words sink in "You obviously care about Valleyrose a lot, and you have the same kind eyes as Oakshade... I think she would be lucky to have you as a mate" she paused looked up at him diresctly this time "My opinion on the matter, shouldn't affect your decision. What you and Valleyrose choose to do is between you, but if it is me that is stopping you... Well I give you my blessing"