Tenebrousrequiem stopped fussing with the mouse when she began to speak.

He stepped back from the food and sat back listening to her intently.

Tenebrousrequiem sighed as he listened, gaze lowering to the food. He had to resist the urge to start fiddling with the mouse again. What was he supposed to say?

"You're saying to make your father proud you have to force yourself on Bravepaw." Tenebrousrequiem said bluntly. "Is that the gist?"

Tenebrousrequiem stood there stunned a moment.

"There's sacrifices, and then there's abuse." He meowed. "And then there's absolute character assassination. This... this isn't you Ferventprayer! You're a cat who loves her family, her clan, and her religion."

"You're telling me your father's pride is more important than your feelings? In Bravepaw's feelings? What do you think will happen if you force yourself on Bravepaw? How will life be normal then?" Tenebrousrequiem demanded. "He was angry enough with you floating the idea, how do you think it'd be if you forced it farther? If you forced him to be with you? Tell me Bloodystar hasn't stolen the compassion out of your heart Ferventprayer! If he has I'll-I'll- I don't know what I'll do!" He said claws digging into the fabric of the blanket.

Tenebrousrequiem immediately moved forward and wrapped around her. "I wouldn't let him hurt you." He said simply. "And I doubt he hates you..."

'He just wants to control you.'

But he didn't say that, instead he pressed his head against her. "Slow down." He instructed, "You need to breathe. Breathe and tell me what you need." He said firmly. "And be honest. Like... like you're praying to the sun god, he'd want you to be honest right? Otherwise what's the point. So tell me, out loud, what you honestly want."

Tenebrousrequiem froze when she said she wanted to be with him.

"You... want to be with me?" He echoed pulling back to look at her. His stomach sinking.

She shouldn't want to be with him. He'd been a terrible cat! He'd come to watch her and her clan burn down! He'd watched with glee as she was ripped from her real parents and molded under Bloodystar's rule. He'd been right along with Bloody, feeling gleeful until realization had hit him. He'd placed himself at ground zero of it all.

Then he'd latched onto her for safety... and eventually it bloomed into a semi friendship, but Tenebrousrequiem could never forget the horrible way he'd looked down on her in his thoughts before. She didn't deserve a cat who'd looked down on her like that. 

He'd kill a cat who'd even think of her like that. Even his younger self if he could.

"... Ferventprayer." He said softly. "I... I don't deserve to be with you. You deserve better. Not because of what Bloodystar wants but... you just deserve better. Not who Bloodystar wants, but... someone who's better than me. I'm... I'm not good." He said turning away. "You're good, you're wonderful. And I'm... not."

Tenebrousrequiem turned back to her, he could see the way her face fell and his heart cracked. "You want to know why I'm terrible?!" He said suddenly.

"It's not you, so stop-stop looking so sad. It's me okay!" He said. "Please stop looking like that, you're wonderful Ferventprayer. You're kind, devoted, caring, and-and-!"

"I'm just a mean cat! I was raised to be a bully and a bully is all I know how to be! You don't deserve to be stuck with a cat like that! You deserve a cat who cherishes you and loves you. and can be warm, and kind, and makes you happy? Do I make you happy?!"

Tenebrousrequiem's breath caught when she kissed him again. As she pulled back and told him how she saw him, his pelt grew hot and he ducked his head.

'Its like you were meant to be by my side.'

That wasn't an accident, that was something by design. He'd done everything in his power to make himself like that. For safety he'd told himself once upon a time. But now... now it had gone from keeping himself safe, to no longer caring about his own safety.

If Ferventprayer had told him that in order for her to be happy she wanted Bloodystar dead, he'd go out and do everything he could to bring the high priest's heart on a platter to her. Regardless of how likely that'd be a death wish to him.

Somehow it had gone from him being in control and manipulating himself and his actions, tailoring himself to her, as an act. Had somehow at some point become his reality.

He didn't pretend to care anymore, he did. He didn't just care, he loved her.

Even just seeing her so crushed when he pulled away made him desperate to fix it.

He shuffled his paws uncomfortably.

'Tell her the truth, she'll realize how bad you are for her and then she'll leave!'

But oh, the shock of pain at that thought. The right thing to do was be up front and admit he'd joined SunClan to be mean. He'd joined SunClan to look down on her and all the other sunclanners pain because Bloody would hurt them all.

But his heart ached at losing her. That it truly would be too much for this sweet soul and she'd turn up her nose and call him vile.

His stomach churned at the idea of seeing her gaze go from love to hate.

And worse, what Bloodystar would do to him when he found out the truth.

Tenebrousrequiem would be executed on the spot for such treasonous thinking. Though truthfully death would be more merciful than facing Ferventprayer's hatred for the rest of his life.

So he swallowed down the bile, the truth of who he had been and pushed it aside. He'd just... have to do better. For her.

As long as he spent every day trying to make up for the awful no good cat he'd been it would be... okay not to tell her. Right?

"I love you Ferventprayer." He confessed pressing in close to her wrapping his tail around her and pulling her in close to him. "I would do anything to make you happy. I want to be able to be there for you always. I want you to know whenever you need me I want to be there helping you. Nothing makes me happier than when you're smiling and your normal self."

Tenebrousrequiem purred in response. "One problem at a time. For now, let's... let's enjoy this date to the fullest. We're both hungry." He said flicking his tail towards the prey pile. "And we've earned some time to just... relax and enjoy each other's company."